Navigating the world of dating and online dating can be overwhelming, especially for any of us guys on the timid side. Confidence really is the key to being successful in the dating world and in life. Unfortunately, the reality is many of us simply lack it.
Now even if you already have confidence, knowing how to land a date and what to do on the date once you get it is quite the challenge in and of itself. Can it get any more difficult? It absolutely can. Simply Google dating tips and you’ll see what I mean. There is a lot of conflicting advice out there.
If you’re still single and are sick of one failed date after another, or you’re one of those guys who hasn’t even been on a date in what seems like forever, don’t fret. We’re going to provide some practical tips to get you back on track.
What you are going to discover is that all these tips lead to one thing; confidence. Confidence is the ultimate factor to be successful in the dating world and in life. Men, you’ve got to take life by the balls!
Solutions to Boost Your Confidence and Help You Land a Date
While this might be easier said than done, confidence really is the key to success and the foundation of this article.
Confidence ultimately comes down to you and where you are in life. If you’re in the dumps and have been stagnant in this department for awhile, thankfully, there are solutions that work for nearly any man.
There really is no way around this one. Confidence is king just as a king is confident. But how do you boost your confidence? Here are two tried and tested ways to do so.
1. Join a Freaking Gym
The first solution we are going to prescribe to you is to go join a freaking gym. A man with low testosterone is a man with low testosterone, and because testosterone is essentially what makes a man a man, you need to get this shit flowing in your life.
Exercise is a godsend when it comes to getting your test to flow again. In addition to increasing your testosterone, exercise also increases the production of many other feel good chemicals in your body. On top of this, improving your physical image and building muscle increases confidence a shit ton.
No excuses here, guys, get your butt a gym membership and start working out. If you already work out and your confidence still sucks balls or you’re just starting out and don’t really know shit, you need to up your game. Hire a trainer to motivate you and show you new moves and watch inspirational fitness freaks like Larry Wheels – the dude is a monster, awesome, humble, and motivating.
Working out at a gym and building your body cannot be stressed enough. Even an average or below average looking man increases their chances of landing a woman a ton when they are in shape. This means more confidence in the man and women are attracted to guys who are in shape. It’s always a win-win here.
But what if you’re “ugly?” While you can’t always do much about your face, you’d be surprised how much a difference working out will have on your face if you’re overweight. Losing fat means losing your fat face which ultimately will improve your jawline and overall look by miles. This makes a huge difference, Google it to see what I mean.
Now if you think you’re “ugly” or you are in fact “ugly” by society’s standards, it’s obviously going to be difficult for you to improve your face with exercise. However, by getting in shape, your “desirability score” will now be higher than it was when you were both ugly and out of shape. Think of it as a point system. At least now you’re an “ugly” jacked and ripped out of his mind, testosterone fueled beast!
Jokes aside, if you absolutely feel you must do something about your face to be confident, you could always look into solutions to improve your face, such as surgery, etc. Though, that’s going to be on you to look into as it’s outside the scope of this article.
In conclusion, working out and getting in shape is probably the biggest thing you can do to improve your confidence. Being fit will help you in more ways than you can imagine, especially when it comes to dating.
2. Get Your Finances in Order
This is another big one. In our modern society, money seems to make the world go around. This also happens to be one of the most challenging pieces of the puzzle in life for most of us. Feeling like a broke joke kills confidence, especially for us men who face extreme societal pressure in this regard.
We are not financial experts so this one is mostly going to be on you. That said, we’re not going to leave you high and dry without giving you some guidance.
If you’re stuck in a 9 to 5 that feels like slavery and you dread going to work each day, you’re not alone. Honestly, this means it’s probably time to switch careers. Yeah, we know, easier said than done, right?
We get it, we really do, but you need to find a way to make money which doesn’t make you miserable. Being miserable is anti-confidence. Being successful in dating and life might just be forever elusive if you aren’t happy in your career, especially if you make shit for money on top of this.
If this is you, start with tip one by joining a gym to get your testosterone flowing and this will in turn elevate your confidence a bit. This initial boost of confidence will then make it easier for you to start looking for a new job or a solution to a new future job – say going back to college, for example. The latter might just be what is needed to make more money which will dramatically impact the quality of your life, especially your dating life.
In conclusion, finances are another major piece of the confidence puzzle. If you can land a better job that makes you feel happier, whether you make more money or not, or you land a new job that brings you in more income, both will improve your confidence and ultimately improve your success in the dating world.
Landing That Successful Date
Landing a successful date may be easier than you think, especially if you have the body and financial confidence to match your great personality. Your chances of landing a successful date increase tenfold when you’re confident as hell.
However, if you haven’t dialed-in your body and finances, or at least your outlook when it comes to both, landing a date and it being a successful one, might be a major challenge for you. That said, this doesn’t mean you still can’t land a “date.” In fact, just about anyone can land a date.
This brings us to our first question. So what are your goals when it comes to dating? Are you looking for a long-term relationship? How about a one-night stand? Maybe you are open to either. Regardless, it’s important to have a goal.
Are You Seeking a Long-Term Relationship?
If you’re in the long-term relationship bucket and that is what you seek, it’s almost always imperative that you’re confident as fuck if you want to land a great woman and keep her in your life for the long haul. While you might meet a beautiful woman and things may even go well for awhile, eventually your lack of confidence may bite you in the butt and this will take a toll on your relationship, possibly even causing it to collapse entirely.
Again, going back to earlier in this article; having confidence is the ultimate when it comes to dating and being successful at it and in life. We feel being in great physical and financial shape are two of the biggest pieces of the success equation.
Now whether or not you already have that confidence or you simply want to roll your dice to find a potential long-term relationship partner, it’s time to land that date. For long-term relationships, websites and/or apps like E-Harmony, Match, Bumble, and POF are popular options.
Once you’ve signed up, be sure to be honest and transparent in your profile. Let them know about you and what you seek. Exude that confidence but don’t be a douche! Also, be sure to put up some quality photos. A woman will run the other way if you look like a rapist or don’t have any photos. Try a variety of photos, and for God’s sake, don’t put up a shirtless selfie if you’re looking for a long-term lady. Perhaps try posting an action shot where you are participating in your favorite hobby, a shot with you and your friends having a good time or you playing with your favorite pooch. Throw in a nice close-up of your “handsome” face as well and one of you dressed to impress.
If you want to meet a girl offline, try going to a local pub, a coffee shop, church, a school event, etc. Meetup.com is also a great tool to meet someone offline. We love Meetup because it is basically an online and offline experience bundled into one. You can dial-in your selection for groups where people are going to share similar interests. A friend of mine met his wife via a Meetup group. They share the same passion and I feel that is what made them connect so quickly.
In conclusion, landing a date isn’t as impossible as you may think. The challenge here is landing a date and turning that date into a successful and long-term relationship. Physical and financial confidence are two of the biggest factors for long-term success. If you have both and you and your partner also have hobbies or other interests in common, your chances of long-term success increase even more.
Are You Seeking a Short-Term or One-Night Stand Relationship?
If you seek a one-night stand or a short-term dating experience, you’re still going to need some confidence to proceed and be successful. Even those with almost no confidence can land a girl for a night – she’s called a prostitute. But even then, many don’t even have that tiny inkling of confidence to go through with that.
Confidence requirements aside, if you are only seeking a woman for a fun night out on the town, “Netflix and chill,” et cetera, there are quite a few options at your disposal. If a prostitute simply isn’t your thing, there are a ton of online dating apps that can help you land a date. For example, there is Adult FriendFinder, w4m maps, and many others to facilitate this journey.
Of course, if you want to challenge yourself and truly test your confidence, try going to a local club or bar and approach women the old fashioned way. This is a real test of confidence right here. Some things to improve your chances of success are dress nice and don’t be creepy.
To not be creepy means approach a woman with confidence, but without staring at her all night first or coming on too aggressive, and definitely don’t grope her or perform some other mega doucebaggery move when you finally muster up the courage to go talk to her. If you must drink to loosen up to boost your confidence a bit, go ahead and drink some to loosen up but don’t get wasted or you might just screw up your game.
Once you approach a woman, offer to buy her a drink, be charming by bringing some humor into the conversation, et cetera. It can really be as simple as you approaching them and asking how their night is going and if you can buy them a drink. This might sound cliché but if you have confidence, a nice body (see earlier in the article!), and are dressed to impress; you will be surprised how many respond in a positive manner to your advance. Getting them back to your house is another story, though!
As far as dressing goes, this depends on the bar or club you are going to. Generally, however, this simply means do not dress like a scrub or you just might not get some love!
At the end of the day, or night, landing a one-night stand or a so-called “Netflix and chill girl” is all about confidence. Whether you use online websites or apps or approach a girl at a club, your confidence is the fuel and one of your greatest keys to success.
The Bottom Line
Confidence and dating go hand in hand. Even if you have a little confidence, it is necessary fuel to land a date with a woman. No confidence equals no success in dating.
Women love a confident man, and a confident man usually has his body and finances in order. Unfortunately, this seems to be a requirement in today’s society, especially western society, so there is almost no getting around this.
That said, you don’t have to have the body of a Greek God or the pocket book of Jeff Bezos, however, the more you can boost your confidence, the more success you are going to have in the dating world and in life, period.